Writing Robust

Early in the last year, I made a a silent yet stolid agreement with myself. I would write as much as possible.

I have always known that I wanted to write. The papers presented to the mr and ms. in partial fullfillment of the course to the stupid little sketches in 8th grade to brit lit. and all the shebers howard. To the jj johnson even though he was a dick. To the shhissel and Mr. Syr.

It was the Timne’s class that was the best. We read Frankenstein and the Romantic poets. She wrote that book when she was 18 with bysshe her bo and the byron lord.

I had so much respect for that monumental accomplishment.

Anyways, I could never commit to writing more than 10k on any given story.

Last year in february I took Christi Kruugs Wildfire Writing class at Clark college. It worked.

Since February last year, I have written 100k+ in freewrites and 65k on my first novel.

That is what i call robust 🙂

~curly

Momentum and Inertia

Starting is always the hardest part. The last two nights I had pretty clear ideas of what I was going to write. Tonight, I do not have one clear idea, but I am tired right now and would rather log out, go to sleep and deal with another very long day tomorrow. Bad idea. Why?

 

Momentum. I know that if I can post every day for a few weeks, I can build the habit into my life. This practice will then give me a tool to gain momentum and build my currently swirling and coalescing project once it is actually ready to be realized. I am not sure where I am going, but I still have to pack. There is still work to be done even though I do not know all of the details of this work.

So this is what I will do. There are many types of learning, absorbing and doing. So far in life, writing is always key. To learn, I must write. I process externally. This can be annoying in a crowded room as I tend to share my thought process with the world, but in the silence of the night with the dim glow of the screen and the cool air coming through the windows, I am able to think deeply.

Writing is hard. Building your dreams is hard. Deciding is hard. That is what I am stuck with at the moment, many wheels are turning and it seems that I come up with a new idea every day. When the sheer volume of choices overwhelms me, I need to think logically. Which of these things can I do now. I am also guided by the stickiness of the idea. There are some that come back to me over and over again. That get fleshed out in my head and seem to grow massively every few weeks with each new insight or application. The evidence is clear by the magnitude of files in my many “ideas” folders scattered throughout my antique laptop.

Back again to Momentum. It’s a showstopper present and pervasive throughout life. With it, it all flows, without it halts and sinks into mud. I see this issue tonight as I sit here and write. It is 3 am right now. I went upstairs at 1 am after watching the DVR’d Argentina v. Netherlands game. The outcome had me feeling good. I was set to write. Then I checked facebook, looked up types of nightshade foods, researched grad school programs on sustainability and fisheries and signed up for a coding site. And I watched a few videos of Messi and Rhonaldino and for some reason something about 5 foods to never eat.

Distractions and Procrastination all. And that is where inertia affects my life in the moment.

Zoom out, widen the perspective, take a look at the range and not just the mountain and this marginally more evolved pattern recognizing monkey can distinguish said pattern.

Writing, been dreamin’ of it since 14.  I laid awake at night dreaming of my first book. I obsessed over the fact that Mary Shelley wrote Frankenstein when she was 18 when I was 16. I devoured the blue room at Powell’s every chance I got. I analyzed their techniques. Once I was watching Conan interview Scorsese about Gangs of New York, love that movie. Scorsese talked about the first time he had the idea for the movie which was when he visited St. Patricks in New York and realized that the then Italian congregation used to be Irish. I am paraphrasing. Imagining the future I saw myself there in that position being interviewed for my first book. It haunts me to think of the number of hours of practice that would be in the bank already if I had jumped in fully earlier. Then I work on my presence, which is another topic for another post.

Writing has always returned.

Still I keep putting up obstacles in the path. Getting a B.A. was useful but it did not help my goal directly. Travelling helped me gain experience and more inspiration, but again I was set waiting. Working in restaurants and in schools just took up all of my time. These are all the facebook shares youtube videos of my life. A lot of information, but obstacles to the dream.

The world has opened up in the last 15 years. It is much easier to write and be read than it used to be.

And though the project is as of yet undefined, swirling around in sea of thoughts and occasionally ascending from subconscious and then drifting away again.

For now, the task is-build momentum. Writing is writing is writing. And when I have something profound to say and those stories are ready, I will be ready to write it.

 

Curlin’

C.A.

 

 

Two Challenges for the New Year

Happy New Year!!

It is the new year. A perfect time to start a new series of challenges for the mind, body and spirit

Number one

31 yoga sessions in 31 days. AKA yoga every day

Number two

500 words a day for 31 days. You can see the my 500 words badge on the right. This project is sponsored by Jeff Goins, click the sign on the side to find out more about this inspirational project.

Yoga

It started simply last night, last year, on the 31st of december 2013. I had an idea to go to a yoga class on New Year;s day. When I checked the list at my brothers favorite studio I saw one of his favorite teachers listed. He had been telling me for the last year that I had to try her class.

The problem was the schedule said ten am. I thought it was unlikely that I would be awake at that time since New Years eve partying was soon to commence. To the astonishment of my roommates and myself, I was up at 9 am and headed out the door to yoga a little before ten.

It worked out, the class was amazing. The flow stimulated physical growth, the theming was inspirational and the energy was vibrant. It truly is something to do yoga in a room brimming with unabashed positive energy. If you are ever in Denver, I urge you to try Buffy Barfoots classes. They are incredible. There will be much more on this experience at a later time.

Mediation: An intention of joyous presence. To be one with the moment and manifest the future dedicated moment at a time.

Writing

Expression is key for inner harmony. Words are not meant to be canned or boxed up inside. It is time to unpack the voice. Self Expression is a vehicle for therapeutic change. The quote I have heard most often over the past year is, “be the change in the world that you want to see.” And now I can see the change in myself that I want to be. Yoga helping me calm my voice and aiding in its expression.

That is why I am doing the challenge. I am a fairly creative thinker. There a plethora of thoughts and ideas that float around in my head. Distraction can derail the train of my thoughts and lead to unexpressed ideas. With so much going on, I crave order, discipline, and accountability. The 500 words a day challenge will give me a structure in which to play. Play with words, play on words, interact with all of myself and speak the voice.

Part of the challenge is to free write and avoid editing. This will be beneficial for my process, because I can get caught up in the idea of using the perfect words and letting the ideas escape during the delay. It will also help with acceptance. I feel that the constant editing is a manifestation of dis-ease in my being. The instinct to self-correct, self-deprecate, and undercut my achievements are linked. To allow acceptance of the present moment in my life and in writing will not only allow me to have a more joyous presence. It will also allow cultivation of a resilient spirit, unaffected by past worries and unnerved by what is to come.

These are all the hopes. The dreams of what I hope to accomplish with these two challenges. To push myself physically while exploring the abundant denver yoga scene and speak my voice all the while. Communication is key. From the nerve receptors to the keys on this computer.

Next up for yoga: Day two of Yoga, A bikram class with my sister

Next up for writing: Exploration of reconnecting with family.

**Disclaimer, this post was written on January 1st, 2014. The posting will say January 2nd, because of the Timezone stuff on wordpress. Disregard that info, this is the first of 31 posts.

Curl on,

~C.A.